These past couple of days, I have been experiencing the severe trembling sensations in my legs. Well, I have these sensations all of the time, of course, however the trembling has been somewhat more severe recently. It is not just these sensations which I have found to be particularly troublesome of late; the fatigue, and the pain associated with the spastic paraparesis have also been bothersome. At times, living with all these symptoms as well as the constant dizziness has been increasingly difficult and miserable. Everyone reading this who also experiences chronic illness, will know that when experiencing a relapse, or a bad flare regarding our symptoms, you need to balance the amount of physical activity whether it be exercising, going out or doing chores around the house, with resting your body and taking a break from activity that may exacerbate symptoms.
And I have been doing this; I have listened to my body and took a break from attending the gym, as the trembling in the legs on the day I usually visit was particularly bad. I even had to cut short my day out with my carer as I felt too unwell and tired to go anywhere else, on that particular day. However, I have also found that whilst I was balancing the amount of physical activity I was doing and resting; the symptoms were still not improving. So, when Thursday arrived, and as I hadn’t been out for a few days, and felt miserable as a result, I decided to thrown the rule book out of the window and enjoy the day without worrying about symptoms or maintaining that balance of physical activity with resting. Of course, on the day I needed to take my wheelchair because of the severity of the trembling in the legs, but was determined that despite all this I was going to enjoy the glorious weather and spend the day away from my bed and the same four walls that I had been cooped up in for several days.
I am so glad that I went out despite not feeling my best and whilst battling severe symptoms.
I had a really enjoyable day out; the weather was gloriously warm and it felt so lovely to be out of the house and feeling the warm sunshine on my skin. The symptoms, and especially the trembling in my legs were still so bothersome that I was unable to go to the gym, so we decided that instead we would spend the day visiting a little town near to where I live called Cowbridge. I had previously only been there once, and not for very long so thought it would make a change to visit somewhere relatively new and going into little shops and boutiques that I had never experienced before. I even managed to treat myself to a gorgeous ring that I had seen online by one of my favourite jewellery designers Annie Haak, but had been unsure of purchasing as I was worried that it would not fit my very small fingers! However, whilst browsing the shop windows in Cowbridge, we came across a little jewellery store that stocked these very same rings! And after trying on the ring and found that it did fit my fingers, I bought it. I am so pleased with my purchase and is a lovely reminder of our day out and triumphing over my symptoms.
“When we are experiencing more bad days then good, we need to make the most of those good days” (Click to Tweet)
The day was not just spent shopping; part of the day was spent relaxing in this pretty and scenic gardens that my carer came across on a previous visit to Cowbridge. It was so nice just to sit and relax amongst the beautiful and colourful flowers. It also created the perfect time to take some photographs to commemorate this splendid day out that I enjoyed so much. In my experience of living with chronic illness, is that when we are experiencing more bad days than good, we therefore need to really make the most of those good days. Living with a chronic illness, it is so wonderful to make lovely memories that we can look back on during the bad days and reflect upon.
The past couple of days after this day out has been very bad; the trembling in the legs were once again very severe, more so than before, and left unable to fully function. Do I regret the day out now? No, absolutely not. As I said before, living a life with illness, where you experience more bad days than good, we therefore have to take full advantage of the days which are good. Although it was not a particularly good day health-wise on this day, I felt that I could physically do more than previous days and so took full advantage. I may be suffering after, however but I still have those lovely, positive memories to look back on and a gorgeous ring to admire.
So, although rest is vital and important when living a life with chronic illness, sometimes however it is just as important to sometimes throw the rule book out of the window and go and make memories to cherish and look back on when illness prevents us from doing anything else. Let’s go out and live our lives, and take full advantage of the rare good days and make glorious memories in the process…